I am a software engg!!

I dont like purist behavior in a career! And i dont like those people who follow it. They irritate me!!!! I dont like them advising me. If they want to practise what they are preaching its okay with me, but they should stop preaching. Argggghh....

Okay, so I like rambling. I dont see anything bad in it. I do talk a lot. I have many things to explain and I have many points to prove. May be thats why i do write a lot. And i write about human behavior. It doesnt matter whether what I write is good or bad,as no one needs to put up with what i write, i dont push it on their face. I have a web address where i blog my thoughts , feel good about having made a point, and read later and enjoy.

This is not a sufficient reason for me to take up writing as a career naaa?? Then why do people frown when I tell them i want to study more? They go aghast at the mere mention of it. I like writing. But i also like software. Whats the big deal? Why the fuss about doing higher studies only if you are in loooove with it??? Thode na main Dante hoon??

Blogging, or to be more specific, descrbing my complex thoughts on fellow complex human beings, makes me feel good. Its a hobby. I do it for clearing my mind and for fun. But there will be some purist sitting there, perusing through my blogs, pondering over it and wondering why dont i make writing my career. Arre bhai, I do have a career naaa.I am a software engineer having a software development job. I am highly satisfied with my career choice. I like my career choice, work environment, and i do a good job there.

Then why rant about the need for me to switch my career? Where is the need to always make your career from your hobbies itself. Some idiot sees the movie 3 idiots and starts rambling about making your career based on your hobby. So if you like clicking photos, the only thing you should do is click click click. Else you will be penitent for the rest of your life! Hogwash! Inane public!

Humans are complex beings, and the most complex organ of the body is the brain. Its capable of excelling at many things and not just one. Human liking can never be like a binary switch. You may yourself like a multitude of things. Or you can be a person having a general aptitude. Meaning you dont like anything excessive, but in general are good in whatever you do.So its fine for you to not take up your hobby as your career. Also, that may.not necessarily pay. At the end of the day, we have got families to feed.

Lets take a pragmatic example. Imagine a person to be in love with a certain technology.He makes his career out of it. Now the technology gets wiped out completely in the next 5 years. Its possible as we stay in a fickle IT world. Constantly changing at exponential rate. Will that person retire early and sit @ home,or will he get inspired by the novel who moved your cheese and start learning again? Constant learning, quickly adapting and some other related things are what is required for success. Hobbies can be pusued in your spare time. That way, there wont be any demand dictating your creativity and you will be happy.

So the next time when I tell you I want to go for higher studies, dont scowl. Keep your "PURISM" with yourself. I dont need it. I am not turning in to a full time writer for sure.

I always thought Deepak was a stupid man. Really stupid. He always did something which made me laugh. Made me wonder at times to which world does he belong. His acts amazed me. Sometimes shocked. All my friends always ridiculed him.He usually stayed aloof. He was different. And since he didnt find anyone like himself, he found himself alone.
It was a rainy day and school had just begin. I was in my 9th standard. I sat on the last bench with my best friend. We were among the first to arrive. Most of the students in the class were yet to arrive as a result of the heavy downpour outside. As a consequence, our class teacher had cancelled the first lecture, and all of us were having a gala time. Our class was a pandemonium.
And there entered Deepak in the class! Oh boy, was he a sight! Just one look at him and we burst into laughter. He had come to the class wearing a lungi. Wearing a lungi to a school in mumbai was unheard of from the times of my dads generation. So this sight of deepak definitely put us in splits. All my friends started pulling his leg. Some who were mean laughed on his face. Others who wanted to be nice laughed on his back. laugh, us all did. Even our class teacher couldnt stop smirking. What i couldnt understand for the life of me, was how come deepak never shied away from doing something so outrageous. Really!! seemed that man either loved attention, or he simply came from mars.
after a while the commotion died down, and we realised it was his birthday and hence the fancy dress. We did wish him later on , with wishes like Happy Birthday Weirdo.This was just a one off incident. There were other incidences as well. Like Deepak  not playing cards, him not eating nonveg on thursdays, him consulting the astrologer for advice, everything about him seemed weird. I spend some thought on him and figured out he seemed a perfect example of a person who is traditional in his thought and manner. But what I did not understand was why he did have to follow all the traditional things. We live in a society where we are free to question, ponder over our question, and then decide on our course of action. Surely Deepak must have thougt about changing the way he dresses on special ocassions. Must he not be observing the common trends
? Surely he must have even thought about why should nonveg be eaten only on special days? And he must have known there is no logic behind it. Yet he continued to follow them. Weirdo!!
Years later, today , I am sitting in my balcony sipping coffee. I have just had a fight with my huband and i am feeling a bit sad. Feeling a lot miffed also. There is a lot of frustration building inside me , and I am do not know what to do about it. We both are working, at both the places home as well as office. We struggle at both the places. Due to our demanding jobs, we hardly get time for each other.Every month we make some new decisions. We will spend a stipulated amount of time together. We will divide the work at home to suit us both. We try in vain to make new plans every day, and we end up not following them. We dont have any set routine or discipline in our lives, which is adding to our woes. Today also I had a bitter fight with him on the same issue. With no routine, there is no gurantee of things happening , which washes away
half of your  expectations
and when your expectations dont meet , you are bound to feel sad and neglected. Happines flies away.
My mind has got nothing to do and it is wandering away. Surprisingly Deepak entered as a flash thought and I started thinking about him. A smile played across my lips. How much I used to Laugh on him  Me with my anti- dogmatic approach, and him being the purist traditional guy. Now somehow it all made sense to me. How different was i trying to be than him? I just decided with my husband about having dinner outside every sunday night. He used to eat nonveg only on certain days! Having dinner outside every sunday did not seem odd , as i had a logical answer to it. Working professionals are fre on that day and can enjoy more. Very soon this ritual will become a tradition for my nuclear family. In a similar fashion, Deepaks clan must also have had some logical explanation to this  tradition of theirs . There is no point in debating the validi
validity or the soundness of the logic behind the tradition now. It was ibtroduced for a reason back then, and following it now brings them joy. Not following them will rather hurt the sentiments of their family. My household tradition of going out every  sunday may seem illogical to my kids, but their not following it will hurt me. Humans need  discipline and order to feel secure and safe. Over a period of time , the way we do things becomes a pattern and later tradition. Habits are introduced as a convinience for current social conditions. Over a period of time, when they are a tradition and no longer habits,they may seem funnny or weird. But they are followed purely for the purpose of obtaining joy. Ridiculing them is actually what an ignorant person will do.
Deepak with all his nidyosyncranies, was far more happier than what I am now with my modern approach. I have traditions missing.

60 minutes

You know how you will feel, if you are tied by a string underwater 50 meters. You have an oxygen mask which is just about going to last for 60 minutes. Those 60 minutes are going to be the most miserable minutes of your life. Most importantly you will be filled with the dread of dying. And whatever space the dread leaves, regret will fill the remaining. Of not having done things which you always wanted to or should have. Its magical, how you always get clarity in your thinking right in the middle of a calamity. But never mind, let’s not complain, as don’t forget you are still under water dreading the last 60 minutes of your life. You want to live more. You don’t want to perish. And what is that you live for? A current generation answer would be money, fame, happiness, love. Some may want to live for honor. But whatever is it that ticks you that is something you are bound to miss the most. Dread it. You have 60 minutes.

In the first few minutes you will end up using a lot of oxygen. You will use all might and no brains to set yourself free. Then, buried under the emotional and physical weight of the calamity and the oxygen mask, you will begin to grow weary and tired. You will give up your struggle to set yourself free. You will resign to God. Memories will rush to you in a flood faster than water. Good, Bad. Both. You may smile occasionally. You will check the time on the clock. You will be alarmed to see that only 5 minutes are remaining. Where did the time go? Didn't you have half an hour more? In vain you will struggle again to set yourself free. You will end up using more oxygen in the process. All of a sudden you feel there is no oxygen coming. But you are afraid to remove your mask as you fear the water will enter your body. Your body starts sending signals to your brain to breathe. But your brain has stopped functioning as there is oxygen for it. Your reflexes take command of the military like situation created around you. Automatically you throw your oxygen mask as it’s now causing you lot of suffocation.

Your body greets the water with the hope of meeting heaven in the form of oxygen. You take deep breaths thus drinking in large sum of waters through your nose. Something feels wrong. So you open your mouth as well in the hope of getting oxygen. Water never gave you any oxyge!. But due to the lack of oxygen, your brain is already dead to figure this out. Slowly all the air cavities in your body get filled and consumed with water... and then you rise above!

Lost love

I have loved and lost
Oh my lover, you are not to blame
I always knew , we couldnt be together
Yet, i tried
.......
I admired in you your values,
They were just what I was seeking
Even though you dint seem to like mine.
Still , I tried
.......
You are a fine person I know
But what made you magnificent,was my very desire for you
I thought you are a diamond..
And So , I tried ....
.......
And when I did try,
You squirmed and said no,
It hit me worse than a poisonous arrow,
I hit the ground hard, after this try!
.........
Now the poison is out
And I have stood up again
To see you are still the same person you were
Only my want and desire for you is not there anymore
Why is it that I lost my mind for you
I dont understand now
But finding the answer , i will surely try!!!

Onions & Potatoes

Onions and potatoes,
Please dont cry!
I know my clan stays away from you
Oh you little angels! ,
It is not that they dont like you
They have nothing against you
From earth you rise
And to earth they will also go,
That is no reason for them to treat you so
While plucking you out,
The other lives die.
Who were thriving in the crevices
Of your roots and stem
It is for their sake,
My clan sacrifices you..
They seek the well being of all
There is no discrimination..
Don't ever get us wrong..
For its not that one is superior than the gang
They live and let live..
And so stay away!

In the process

Alone in my room at night,
I try and think over things,
There is a race of being nice or vice,
In whose favor should the winning bell ring.

Why am I so silly,
Why am I so vain?
The senses have told me whats right.
Then why must I endure this pain?

The story started

There is a long story to be told,
Interesting it may sound,
Truth it may not hold,
But surprises it has manifold,
The wisdon it gives is age old,
The end may seem cold.

Let me begin before the start,
As chassis I must lay.

I fell down from a ladder
Not so while ago,
It gave me deep wounds,
My head was hurt,
Body had bruises,
And i needed a doctor.

I knew i should have gone to the clinic.
But i feared being thrashed.

To be continued sooon:)....

I am a Scorpion...

Once upon a time there were 9 planets. After Pluto’s demotion we are now left with 8. These 8, along with the demoted Pluto, affect around 7 billion population of the world. And I am only talking about the human population. If we leave the human demographic aside, we see a much higher number of animals & plant population. Surely the planets must be affecting them! <Marketing Innovation Labs should start selling animal astrology. Shouldn't we have a Scorpion Labrador, Virgo parrot and a Pisces cat?>

Okay, let’s not digress away. So, we have Mercury Venus Earth affecting some humans and thereby classifying them in to some star signs. So we have 23 categories of people<Yes, my mathematics is correct. There are 12 star signs and 11 cusps> on the planet. Now if we can safely rely on probability, then I can say that each of these groups must be having saints and sinners. Each of the above 23 groups must be having social workers and criminals. There must be artists, politicians, scholars and dreamers in all. Some people from each group must have committed suicide. Some must have won the Nobel Prize. Leaders, followers, heroes and cowards, we will be having all of them in the groups. Variety is assured! <I don’t have access to any National or International Demographic data, but I am sure if someone does, the above guess can be corroborated.>

Then what binds them together? Clearly if we have so much diversity in any one group, there can’t be any common characteristic. Yet, Linda Goodman’s book on sun signs and star signs sells like hotcakes. The daily astrological forecast in any newspaper is one of the top read articles.

I was born on the 6 of November. The orientation of the planets was such that Neptune was the planet which was affecting me the most followed by Pluto. Now they say that scorpions are mysterious. This fact can only be proven in one way. Pluto was a mystery to us since a very long time. That it’s not a planet at all was revealed only recently!! They say scorpions believe in Revenge. Other star sign people don’t? Scorpions are ambitious. That is person dependent. What has November got to do with that anyway?

People are getting classified in available groups. Characteristics can always be justified. I find the entire star sign concept amusing. I don’t believe in it, but I do read a lot about it. Just for sheer entertainment. My brother believes in it a lot. He is a Libra. So i like to read the section for Librans in the newspaper and tell him his daily forecast. I find it even more amusing that he keeps on telling me, Sis you are a Scorpion, Libras and scorpions are not the best of compatible signs :D. The idea of belonging to one of the 23 types just doesn't seem right to me.

 I was wondering, why are they called star signs? Aren't the planets affecting us?? Or are the remaining 8 planets in line for promotion to be stars????