I always thought Deepak was a stupid man. Really stupid. He always did something which made me laugh. Made me wonder at times to which world does he belong. His acts amazed me. Sometimes shocked. All my friends always ridiculed him.He usually stayed aloof. He was different. And since he didnt find anyone like himself, he found himself alone.
It was a rainy day and school had just begin. I was in my 9th standard. I sat on the last bench with my best friend. We were among the first to arrive. Most of the students in the class were yet to arrive as a result of the heavy downpour outside. As a consequence, our class teacher had cancelled the first lecture, and all of us were having a gala time. Our class was a pandemonium.
And there entered Deepak in the class! Oh boy, was he a sight! Just one look at him and we burst into laughter. He had come to the class wearing a lungi. Wearing a lungi to a school in mumbai was unheard of from the times of my dads generation. So this sight of deepak definitely put us in splits. All my friends started pulling his leg. Some who were mean laughed on his face. Others who wanted to be nice laughed on his back. laugh, us all did. Even our class teacher couldnt stop smirking. What i couldnt understand for the life of me, was how come deepak never shied away from doing something so outrageous. Really!! seemed that man either loved attention, or he simply came from mars.
after a while the commotion died down, and we realised it was his birthday and hence the fancy dress. We did wish him later on , with wishes like Happy Birthday Weirdo.This was just a one off incident. There were other incidences as well. Like Deepak not playing cards, him not eating nonveg on thursdays, him consulting the astrologer for advice, everything about him seemed weird. I spend some thought on him and figured out he seemed a perfect example of a person who is traditional in his thought and manner. But what I did not understand was why he did have to follow all the traditional things. We live in a society where we are free to question, ponder over our question, and then decide on our course of action. Surely Deepak must have thougt about changing the way he dresses on special ocassions. Must he not be observing the common trends
? Surely he must have even thought about why should nonveg be eaten only on special days? And he must have known there is no logic behind it. Yet he continued to follow them. Weirdo!!
Years later, today , I am sitting in my balcony sipping coffee. I have just had a fight with my huband and i am feeling a bit sad. Feeling a lot miffed also. There is a lot of frustration building inside me , and I am do not know what to do about it. We both are working, at both the places home as well as office. We struggle at both the places. Due to our demanding jobs, we hardly get time for each other.Every month we make some new decisions. We will spend a stipulated amount of time together. We will divide the work at home to suit us both. We try in vain to make new plans every day, and we end up not following them. We dont have any set routine or discipline in our lives, which is adding to our woes. Today also I had a bitter fight with him on the same issue. With no routine, there is no gurantee of things happening , which washes away
half of your expectations
and when your expectations dont meet , you are bound to feel sad and neglected. Happines flies away.
My mind has got nothing to do and it is wandering away. Surprisingly Deepak entered as a flash thought and I started thinking about him. A smile played across my lips. How much I used to Laugh on him Me with my anti- dogmatic approach, and him being the purist traditional guy. Now somehow it all made sense to me. How different was i trying to be than him? I just decided with my husband about having dinner outside every sunday night. He used to eat nonveg only on certain days! Having dinner outside every sunday did not seem odd , as i had a logical answer to it. Working professionals are fre on that day and can enjoy more. Very soon this ritual will become a tradition for my nuclear family. In a similar fashion, Deepaks clan must also have had some logical explanation to this tradition of theirs . There is no point in debating the validi
validity or the soundness of the logic behind the tradition now. It was ibtroduced for a reason back then, and following it now brings them joy. Not following them will rather hurt the sentiments of their family. My household tradition of going out every sunday may seem illogical to my kids, but their not following it will hurt me. Humans need discipline and order to feel secure and safe. Over a period of time , the way we do things becomes a pattern and later tradition. Habits are introduced as a convinience for current social conditions. Over a period of time, when they are a tradition and no longer habits,they may seem funnny or weird. But they are followed purely for the purpose of obtaining joy. Ridiculing them is actually what an ignorant person will do.
Deepak with all his nidyosyncranies, was far more happier than what I am now with my modern approach. I have traditions missing.
It was a rainy day and school had just begin. I was in my 9th standard. I sat on the last bench with my best friend. We were among the first to arrive. Most of the students in the class were yet to arrive as a result of the heavy downpour outside. As a consequence, our class teacher had cancelled the first lecture, and all of us were having a gala time. Our class was a pandemonium.
And there entered Deepak in the class! Oh boy, was he a sight! Just one look at him and we burst into laughter. He had come to the class wearing a lungi. Wearing a lungi to a school in mumbai was unheard of from the times of my dads generation. So this sight of deepak definitely put us in splits. All my friends started pulling his leg. Some who were mean laughed on his face. Others who wanted to be nice laughed on his back. laugh, us all did. Even our class teacher couldnt stop smirking. What i couldnt understand for the life of me, was how come deepak never shied away from doing something so outrageous. Really!! seemed that man either loved attention, or he simply came from mars.
after a while the commotion died down, and we realised it was his birthday and hence the fancy dress. We did wish him later on , with wishes like Happy Birthday Weirdo.This was just a one off incident. There were other incidences as well. Like Deepak not playing cards, him not eating nonveg on thursdays, him consulting the astrologer for advice, everything about him seemed weird. I spend some thought on him and figured out he seemed a perfect example of a person who is traditional in his thought and manner. But what I did not understand was why he did have to follow all the traditional things. We live in a society where we are free to question, ponder over our question, and then decide on our course of action. Surely Deepak must have thougt about changing the way he dresses on special ocassions. Must he not be observing the common trends
? Surely he must have even thought about why should nonveg be eaten only on special days? And he must have known there is no logic behind it. Yet he continued to follow them. Weirdo!!
Years later, today , I am sitting in my balcony sipping coffee. I have just had a fight with my huband and i am feeling a bit sad. Feeling a lot miffed also. There is a lot of frustration building inside me , and I am do not know what to do about it. We both are working, at both the places home as well as office. We struggle at both the places. Due to our demanding jobs, we hardly get time for each other.Every month we make some new decisions. We will spend a stipulated amount of time together. We will divide the work at home to suit us both. We try in vain to make new plans every day, and we end up not following them. We dont have any set routine or discipline in our lives, which is adding to our woes. Today also I had a bitter fight with him on the same issue. With no routine, there is no gurantee of things happening , which washes away
half of your expectations
and when your expectations dont meet , you are bound to feel sad and neglected. Happines flies away.
My mind has got nothing to do and it is wandering away. Surprisingly Deepak entered as a flash thought and I started thinking about him. A smile played across my lips. How much I used to Laugh on him Me with my anti- dogmatic approach, and him being the purist traditional guy. Now somehow it all made sense to me. How different was i trying to be than him? I just decided with my husband about having dinner outside every sunday night. He used to eat nonveg only on certain days! Having dinner outside every sunday did not seem odd , as i had a logical answer to it. Working professionals are fre on that day and can enjoy more. Very soon this ritual will become a tradition for my nuclear family. In a similar fashion, Deepaks clan must also have had some logical explanation to this tradition of theirs . There is no point in debating the validi
validity or the soundness of the logic behind the tradition now. It was ibtroduced for a reason back then, and following it now brings them joy. Not following them will rather hurt the sentiments of their family. My household tradition of going out every sunday may seem illogical to my kids, but their not following it will hurt me. Humans need discipline and order to feel secure and safe. Over a period of time , the way we do things becomes a pattern and later tradition. Habits are introduced as a convinience for current social conditions. Over a period of time, when they are a tradition and no longer habits,they may seem funnny or weird. But they are followed purely for the purpose of obtaining joy. Ridiculing them is actually what an ignorant person will do.
Deepak with all his nidyosyncranies, was far more happier than what I am now with my modern approach. I have traditions missing.
No comments:
Post a Comment